One anonymous commenter left a message in response to my blog about reading materials.
The comment was:
When I worked in SF I used to take the Vallejo Ferry to the office. Now, I work somewhere else and take BART. Please someone tell me this: Why are people more social and conversational on the ferry, but on BART no one talks to each other, if you do talk to a stranger, then people think you are a looney!
I've never taken the ferry before but I'd like to try one day although it would be a huge inconvenience to get to the ferry station, and then in SF, to find a way to get to my office. Yet, it just seems like a more pleasant experience all around with the extra space, the water, the view..etc.
This question is a good one because it made me think....I'm not an anti-social person. I talk to people at ballgames, grocery stores, restaurants, even sometimes on the plane! But why is it that on BART, I don't want anyone or anything to bug me. And it is true, the very few that attempt to make conversations with others on BART are considered weirdos. Silence is golden on BART. People really just want to get the ride over with, get to work and get out of the crowded trains.
9 comments:
I think the ferries run a little less often, so you get a bunch of regulars on your trip that you actually can get to know. (I know someone who takes the ferry, and "regulars" is her term for them.) It's funny how when someone is a stranger, it is considered rude to interact with them, but when you know them, it's rude not to interact with them.
I happened to be on BART last Wed night when my car was invaded by a huge contingent of SF Giants fans. They were all animatedly interacting with each other (and even with me, who just happened to be there) in a way that a completely unrelated group of BART riders would never consider doing. I think people are actually hungry for a reason to connect, because they generally are friendly once a connection happens to get made. Too bad you can't count on ready-made common interests with a random seat-mate (as opposed to your fellow sports fans, who have an automatic "in"). Introductions are always kind of stilted, and there is not a lot of reason to make the effort to find common ground when you are unlikely to see this person again.
It's also just more fun to ride the ferry! I don't know, I think the poster above is right, the ferry is smaller and there are more options for 'regulars' to see each other. I'm sure there are regular BART riders, too, but they're less likely to always end up on the same car.
I ride BART every morning and I try to make eye contact with people but most people won't even do THAT. Too bad I can't take a ferry from Richmond to Oakland :-(
Yeah, totally agree. When i say "bless you" to people who sneeze, very few have ever said "thanks" back. I don't strike up conversations with people on BART but I do say hi, thanks, or bless you, and smile whenever appropriate. people don't seem to like that either.
You can drink legally on the ferry. :)
I like my quiet time on Bart before I get home to the normal family madness. It is my only time to sit down and quietly read. Also, I have been at work all day, interacting with many people.
Are you serious?? I would rather have a root canal that to start chatting with people on the BART. From someone who rides BART every day all the way from Pleasanton to San Francisco you learn quickly that there is a code of silence during commuter hours. No cell phones, no chatting allowed. Anyone who breaks the code is subject to nasty glares. I personally prefer the quiet and do get annoyed by people infriging their pointless converstations for all to hear. And for those of you that blare your ipods so all of those around us can hear your music, you are just as bad as someone on their cell phone. Take note and turn it down.
Anonymous (commenter #6), we already know that. The question is, why is it different on the ferry? Related to that, are there any circumstances under which you would enjoy interacting with your fellow BART passengers? For instance, if you knew them well enough to consider them friends? (I know the BART car will always contain a mix of strangers along with the regulars, so it's not the same as the entire group being familiar faces, the way it is on the ferry.)
As a poor college student who's taking BART up to Berkeley for my Summer Sessions classes, I'd like to think that if I could afford to take the ferry everyday, I'd probably be chatting it up with everyone there too...
But until then, I'm content with sitting/napping quietly on BART, listening to my iPod and playing Nintendo DS.
there definitely is something about BART that makes it an unsociable environment, at least during commute hours. maybe people who take it on weekends are more chatty?? does anyone know? someone mentioned that people chat on their way to games...i've done that before too. i guess going to work (or school) or coming back from a tiring day of work just isn't the most invigorating activity in your day. That added to BART's noise, dirtiness, and crowds...who would want to talk?
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